


“It started with the wine”

by bluetutu



Category: Black Widow (Comics), Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Deaf Clint Barton, F/M, Gen, Inspired by TikTok, Inspired by song, Nat and Clint, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Natasha Romanov Joins SHIELD, Ordinary Days musical, Rhymes, Rhyming, SHIELD, SHIELD agents - Freeform, Spies & Secret Agents, Wine, nat and clint are friends with benefits, wine tasting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:28:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26331916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluetutu/pseuds/bluetutu
Summary: Nat and Clint go on a mission to retrieve a flash drive, but argue about which drive to grab. Cute and simple story where Clint and Nat are Bros:) also all the dialogue rhymes.** Cabernet = red wine, Riesling = white wine **
Relationships: Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov, Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 2
Kudos: 22





	“It started with the wine”

**Author's Note:**

> This is based on an amazing cosplay TikTok by @hanjaybear (Natasha) and @capts.rogers (Clint) to the song Fine from Ordinary Days :) I hope you like it!

“Ready, Agent Barton?” Natasha smirks at him and reaches over to adjust his tie.  
Clint smiles, putting in his second hearing aid. “Ready, Agent Romanoff.”  
Another day, another mission. This time, a fairly simple one - they’re going to a fancy wine tasting event at a small, secluded vineyard. They don’t know much, but they’ve been told that SHIELD has found evidence that the owners are hiding something - that the vineyard is a front for something else, perhaps. They’ve learned not to question their jobs too much, not to make useless conjectures that will only confuse them. Get in, act like clueless newlyweds for a few minutes (a part they’ve played so many times before), then sneak into the back rooms and find a flash drive. Simple.  
After sampling a particularly fruity pinot noir, Natasha clings to Clint’s arm and whispers, low and flirtatious in his ear, “Time to go.”  
Clint winks at the nearest couple. “We have some… business to attend to,” he says suggestively. Nat smiles and bites her lip, appreciating his humor. “We’ll be back in a minute or two.”  
It’s not hard to find the offices, and from there it only takes a minute of searching to find the door to the back room. It’s locked, but that doesn’t really matter - Nat picks it in seconds. By prior arrangement, Clint goes left to check the computers and Natasha heads to the right to look through the desk drawers.  
“I found the drive!” they both exclaim at the same time. They turn to look at each other - Clint’s holding a red flash drive and Natasha has a similar white one.  
“It’s supposed to be red!”  
Nat crosses her arms. “No-”  
“HEY!” A guard comes bursting through the doors. “What are you two doing in here?”  
Quickly, they both tuck the flash drives away - Clint’s in his coat pocket, Nat’s in her bra. Clint recovers faster. “It started with the wine.”  
“The wine?”  
“The wine.” Clint gives her a pointed, shut-up-and-let-me-talk-for-a-second look. “We were shopping for a bottle to bring to her cousin’s soirée.”  
“My cousin’s a sous chef,” Natasha adds, giggling and grabbing Clint’s hand. “She’s very gourmet.”  
The guard is looking between them, clearly lost. Good. The more confused he is, the better.  
“I grabbed my favorite Cabernet…” Clint tries to point subtly to the left computer, where he found the drive. Red, he mouths with teeth clenched and nostrils flared.  
Natasha reads the situation, crystal clear. He’s creating a code - red wine, red drive. But she knows he’s wrong. The drive they’re looking for is white.  
She laughs condescendingly, rolling her eyes. “He’s got no clue and so I say, ‘darling, the wine - ’”  
“The wine?”  
“The wine.” She glares at him. “They’re serving monkfish so darling, the wine can’t be red. How about this Austrian riesling instead?” Her hand drifts to the collar of her shirt where the white drive is stored and pulls it up slightly, in a motion that could be a nervous fidget but, just like her giggles and her sleeveless dress, is calculated.  
“Um…” The guard’s fingers have been hovering over his walkie talkie, probably to call in reinforcements if needed, but he puts his hand back in his pocket and takes a step back. Just two silly newlyweds arguing. Probably took a wrong turn.  
Meanwhile, the “newlyweds” still haven’t come to a decision on which drive is the correct one and which one to leave behind.  
“Darling, you know I don’t like the riesling - when have you ever seen me drink riesling?”  
“Never,” Natasha says, growing more exasperated. Why can’t he just trust her? The drive is supposed to be white. “But can’t you listen this once? Red wine and fish, you’ll look like a…” she casts around for a rhyming word and ends up, triumphantly, with “dunce.”  
“Fine.” Clint is getting annoyed too, but he also sees a simple way out. “I’ll bring the red, you bring the white. That way I’ll still get drunk, you’ll still be right.”  
“Fine.” Natasha furrows her brow and shifts her weight slightly forward. Are we fighting our way out of this one? Clint gives her a little nod.  
“Fine.” They both raise their fists.  
“Fine.”  
And with a well-placed punch from Nat and one from Clint, the guard is out cold. And after they drag his limp body out of the way, the head-over-heels in love couple returns to the wine tasting room, Clint with a smudge of lipstick on his cheek and a smug grin, Natasha with her dress slightly askew and her face flushed. Might as well make the lie convincing. What’s the point of a mission if they can’t have a little fun?


End file.
